The match

Match results came out yesterday. One of my interns called in sick and ward activities were incredibly busy. Monday morning, 7 new patients and consultant was coming in an hour.

So I was not surprised that by the time I checked my phone, I had multiple missed calls and messages all asking what my result was and updates from friends regarding who's going where. Within 10 minutes, I had to reply messages, call up friends, check for my match result and also for friends abroad on rural electives. My fingers probably sent over 20 SMSes in that short period of time. I barely had time to register my own result.

I got SH.

I have mixed feelings about it. Too complex to decipher at the moment. Alhamdulillah, it is a first round offer. I guess part of me wanted to leave this suburb and venture somewhere up north. Can't really blame the match because SH was my second choice above WH and AH. If I had really wanted a change of environment, I should have put them first.

In retrospect, I had gone for 8 interviews in total, even travelled to Geelong and Bendigo and wrote so many crazy cover letters and getting second choice probably completely erased all of these efforts. But I've always been a firm believer in 'just in case' or 'InsyaAllah' so I had to make sure I applied to many hospitals, even to SA.

Having said that, several of my good friends got into SH, so I'm happy about it. Anyway no point dwelling too much about it I guess.

It's starting to sink in. I'm confused. Mixed up. Not liking this feeling at the moment.

Thanks to reflective groups, I'm actually reflecting more and more. Analysing my thoughts and feelings. Not good. Listening to Jason Mraz at the moment and humming Money Money Money under my breath. Hmmm.